Small Talk

I could list a million tips on how to make light conversation, but memorizing tips isn't actually going to help you unless you practice each one while practicing talking to someone. So here is an exercise that not only gives you plenty of practice to keep small talk going, but also shows real progress in your ability to keep a conversation smooth with no awkward silences.

1. Find an object in your room. The more ordinary the better. (Example: lamp, blanket, chair, fan, etc.)

2. Watch the clock or set a timer for 5 minutes. You now have 5 minutes to ramble on and on about that object from everything to where you got it from, to what it reminds you of, to its color, to what you use it for.

3. That's it! Put a small box on your calender in each of the next 7 days and as you finish the exercise each day, put a checkmark in each box. Keep practicing for the next 30 days if you want to show even more progress.

Example: "That's a balloon. It's green, which used to be my favorite color. It's gotten a bit deflated, my friends and I blew up a bunch of balloons a week ago just for fun, and now the air is running out. I'm surprised it has lasted as long as it did. Balloons can be so fun to pop. But so loud at the same time. And so difficult to tie! Even with small fingers, I still have a hard time tying balloons. You can see the reflection of the lamp in the balloon. Balloons are so fun to play games with. They're like sports in slow motion. Volleyball is so fun to play with a balloon..." Blah blah you get the idea.

While somewhat annoying and not at all how a real conversation should sound, this exercise gives you the skill of keeping even the simplest of a conversation going. If you can talk for 5 minutes about a thumbtack, you can easily talk for 15 about the weather. And don't worry, you won't sound like an irritating record of pointless info, this exercise only implants in you the ability to come up with something to say to avoid awkward silences, being rude, being stereotyped as "shy", etc.

And of course a few tips:

-Try not to begin too many sentences with "I" in practice. People like to talk about themselves, but few like to listen to an endless monologue about someone else.

-Keep the rambling about your object lighthearted. No one likes to leave a conversation feeling upset. Don't complain about your object or talk about it's downside. Talk about it's good qualities and why you like it.

-Speak slowly and clearly in practice. If you mix your words up a lot, this exercise will help that if you talk a little bit slower until you get the hang of coming up with conversation topics in a split second.